66 sentiments shared

Dream.

Oh heavy heart. Black, rolling clouds. I hear you, I feel you. I cannot think for too long, I cannot let my mind arrive in an older place. I cannot imagine eight.

Instead, I will wander to the morning you were born.
I will greet your dark wisps and your puffy nose and your olive skinned chubbiness.
I will watch you in your Daddy’s arms while he sings to you.
I will think of dancing with you in the kitchen, on my hip in a pink kerchief.
I will imagine you in your Grandy’s lap while he whistles and laughs and dotes.
I will remember hair clips and kneesocks and spotty shoes.
I will watch you skipping into kindy while I call out to slow down.
I will recall your long golden curls and your wide feet and the brown of your enormous eyes.
I will find you with your brothers and your sister, there will be four.
I will see you spinning in our hallway, I will hear you squealing.
I will answer to Miss Mummy.
I will put my arms around you and I will breathe you in and I will love you.
I will be right back there, with you.

Happy Birthday, my darling Ava.

Tucked Away Under // Ava, Family

8 sentiments shared

Ava’s Tea Party 2011

As we venture into August, I’ve spent the last week wholly immersed in Ava’s Tea Party, gathering up ideas and contacting suppliers and making pretty things.  I’m so excited to see lots of plans in the making and to have had such encouragement to continue the event that makes this month not just bearable for us, but on many levels, quite beautiful.

We are happy for people to celebrate at any point in August..it doesn’t need to be on the 22nd (Ava’s birthday) but I know many of you like to plan for that date.   Because the 22nd falls on a Monday in Australia, I’d love to think of Ava’s Tea Party being celebrated where-ever you might need to be on a normal working day.  Should you be looking for suggestions, the wonderful Steph at Party For A Cause has been so helpful in putting together a list of ideas so with her permission, I’m sharing it here..with some random thoughts added by me :).

While the original concept for Ava’s Tea Party began as nothing more than two best friends planning something very pretty, it’s since become so much more.  From the simple to the elaborate, there have been so many beautiful ideas shared over the last three years but however you love to celebrate is the best way.

take time with your FAMILY:
Plan a full top-to-bottom tea party (with or without the fuss).   Enlist the help of your children in decorating and baking, plan out cupcake flavors and choose the location together.  A lot of the fun is just planning the details and I know my own children ask for weeks before hand what we’ll be doing for Ava’s Tea Party.  If you’re a details person and event planning makes you happy, this is the perfect opportunity to stock up on pretties and pull out the recipes (or call the caterer).

For those who break out in hives at the thought of the above, there’s always plan B.  It doesn’t matter if baking isn’t your thing (it’s possibly not mine :p)..take a stroll to the corner store together to pick up some little treats or take ten minutes to make fairy bread at home.  Get the children to color in paper chains and dust off the patio table.   Remember, more than anything,  it’s about the time together.

take time with your NEIGHBORS:
Ava’s Tea Party is about community.  Perhaps this could be an opportunity to knock on your neighbors door and invite them over for a cuppa?   What about a street party or bbq?   Get the neighborhood children together to make their own lemonade stand and donate proceeds to their favorite cause. 

take time in your WORKPLACE:
In my endless list of wishes for Ava is one surrounding the simple idea of work. I don’t know what she wanted to be when she grew up but whatever it was, she didn’t get the chance. As much as I wish for more birthdays for her, I wish for the chance to have formed a career.  So,  those of you who work..amidst the mundane of a regular Monday, I just ask that you give thanks.  Irrespective of the stresses and strains that come with work, it is still a gift to be able to do just that.  So many people cannot – through accident, illness, lack of education or opportunity.  See if the boss will chip in for morning tea or have everyone bring their favorite something and turn Monday into something special.

take time with your MOTHER’S GROUP:
If everyone brings a plate, it’s such an easy way to add something fancy to your regular meet-up.  Or perhaps each make a donation – half for catering and half for your favorite charity. Wear pink and take five minutes to chat about the amazing things motherhood brings, alongside the trials.

take time at SCHOOL:
Could your school participate in a cupcake fundraiser?  What about approaching a local bakery and asking for donations to support Ava’s Tea Party? If not a business, what about asking Mums to bake and donate?  Of course we’d love to raise funds for Paradise Kids/Kid Xpress but you might also have something worth raising funds for.  Ask the student committee to get on board, see if you can add something special to the tuck shop menu for August and share Ava’s Tea Party in your monthly newsletter so that the whole school community can participate.

take time at a DAYCARE CENTRE:
Last year, Ivy’s kinder held a “Fairytale Day” in honor of Ava’s Tea Party.  The children came in dress-up and they read fairytales and turned a regular day into something very magical.    There are so many simple ways to mark Ava’s Tea Party and children just love the chance to plan something special.  “If you want your children to be brilliant tell them fairy tales. If you want your children to be very brilliant, tell them even more fairy tales” – Albert Einstein.

take time at FAMILY DAYCARE:
How about making the 22nd “Sparkle Day”?  Make crowns and learn a new song (here’s Ava’s favorite).  Maybe your carer can bake some cupcakes with the kids and they can all share them together?

take time with your FRIENDS:
It was wanting to celebrate friendship that started the idea of Ava’s Tea Party.  The idea of pausing to say “Wow, I’m so lucky to have  you”.  This August, stop and say thanks to those who know us best and love us anyway.  What a great chance to all get dressed up in your favorite frocks, and maybe host a girl’s night in..or get together and bake some cupcakes, over a glass and a laugh.  And why not some pink bubbles at an adult only get together?  Ava’s Tea Party can just be Ava’s Party, if you so wish :)

take time with our ELDERS:
For those who have an elderly family member, why not  pop by and visit them?  What about time with an older neighbor?  I like to imagine a lonely elderly person receiving an invitation to your little event..it might just make their year.   In researching ideas, I learned that the most depressed group in society are the 60+ as they are often isolated and alone.  Given Ava and her “Grandan” were best friends, this struck such a chord with me.  I just know she would be so delighted to imagine some of the older generation celebrating her special day too.

I hope these ideas give you inspiration if you don’t have plans already but as always, the aim is just to take time in whatever manner works for you and yours.  I have created down-loadable Ava’s Tea Party invitations here for you to use as you wish.  There is also an A4 poster version should you wish to spread the word en masse.   Of course Belle and Boo also have their beautiful invitations available, year round.  If you’d like to purchase the Ava’s Tea Party illustration, you can do so in A3 here and A4 here.

Finally, if you are a organization, supplier or business and would like to be involved in Ava’s Tea Party, please email us so we can recognize your contribution.Thank you to these wonderful organizations who are supporting Ava’s Tea Party in 2011:

Babyology
Party For A Cause
The Lemony Cupcake
Dorothy Cowie School of Dancing
Babycakes
Little Party Paper People/Invite Me
Details Details
Belle and Boo

along with so many other individuals who take time out of their busy lives to pause for our darling girl for what would have been her 8th birthday.  Words could never express the gratitude we feel.  Thank you.

xx Sheye

ps  We’d love to see images of your tea party, if you’re happy to share.  Please upload to the Ava’s Tea Party page at Facebook.  Also, if  I could ask just one more favor?  While you’re planning out tea parties, could you also find ways to distribute the Ava’s Rule postcard?  Whether it be via email, Facebook or in print, it’s so vital that people be aware of the dangers of hot cars.  I like to think of myself as a vigilant parent yet I was unaware and my ignorance resulted in the worst possible outcome.   Over the past four years, I have received numerous emails from families who found their missing child in time, just because they’d seen the Ava’s Rule postcard.  Your simple act of distributing our message could make such a difference.

Keep up with Ava’s Tea Party via Facebook
Visit the Ava’s Tea Party website
A Superprincess

Tucked Away Under // Ava, Family

33 sentiments shared

Take Time. Give Thanks.

I had meant to just type up a post about the plans this year for Ava’s Tea Party..and I will.  Soon.  But firstly, I went looking for an image to go with my post. I wanted pink, pretty, princess. All the things you’d expect to find with a tea party post. Instead, I stopped at this. I stopped and stared and I remembered. I thought of all the things that made me love having a daughter. That made me first catch my breath while tears sprung to my eyes on hearing she was a girl. The times I’d stop and give thanks just to be able to buy hair clips and the joy I’d get from dressing her. That act, that simple act of buttoning her shirt, so many small moments where I’d fill to overflowing with happiness that she was here. Ava. I got her, I got my girl. I would raise her and she would grow and talk to me and fight with me and love me and we would travel a life together, as mother and daughter, seeing each other through good and bad. Oh, my love for her.

In this very image, I see all I adored in Ava. I see the ordinary, every day moments of contentment and gratitude.  I see all my hopes and expectations and I see what never was.   And, I see what Ava’s Tea Party is for.  I don’t mind if your plates don’t match. You don’t need to bake. Paper lanterns aren’t necessary. Please though, this August, take a moment..an extra moment..to reach out and grab your babies or your partners or your best friend. Find that person, find lots of persons, who need to be told how much they mean to you. And if you can’t say it in words, say it by sitting beside them and watching the sunlight hit the grass while you plan your tomorrows. Say it in laughter. Or in silence. Just take time and give thanks.   That’s all.

xx

Tucked Away Under // Ava, Family

33 sentiments shared

Three in the bed.

She sleeps in our bed.
And takes up most of it.
She chats in the wee hours.
And plays with my hair.
She never sleeps in.
So nor do we.
But she loves it and we love it so what are you gonna do?

Here’s bedtime which looks nothing like reading books in soft whispers.

These are snaps taken while I video’d her singing.  She learns Japanese at school and I make her sing this song at least every other day. And when she’s not singing it, my brain recounts it. Over. and over. and over. 

Here’s recording attempt No 1. Complete with gangsta style intro. And no, I don’t know why either.

Take 2, after a bribe-loaded request to ‘do it properly’. So close.

xx

Tucked Away Under // Family, Simple Nothings

24 sentiments shared

The Fun Zone.

Things I have learned from a day at Balboa Island’s Fun Zone:

-  The definition of ‘fun’ is not common to all mankind, just those under 12.
-  No matter how hard you try, you cannot convince a child that the arcade machines are rigged.
-  It will always, always end in tears.
-  When the ferris wheel is traveling at twice the speed of light and the sign says ‘Made in 1985′, you’d probably be best to turn around.
-  Should one be approached by a total stranger who is 1. clearly under the influence and 2. wielding a skateboard, reject all offers to ‘take a photo of all of you’ on your ‘nice camera’.
-  Ice cream and pizza come under ‘healthfood’ when you’re off the mainland.
-  If the kids tell you it was awesome on the way home, it actually was.

Tucked Away Under // Family