Well I feel like I’ve been swallowed whole in the pre-Christmas, post-move mahem and have so many posts waiting to write to catch up.

I’ll start with Ivish on her big day..sorry these are all closeups and none of the actual event. I wasn’t remotely inspired to capture the background of boxes and destruction that was our house on the 12th.

Doesn’t she look so happy in her princess frock. As soon as I saw those dresses lined up at the store, I took a step back, knowing there was no way I could purchase something so Ava. Not yet. And then I thought it’s just what Ava would have picked out as a present for Ivy and it made it okay. When I look at these photos and see her face and remember how much the little girls at kindy oooh’d and ahhhh’d when she walked in, I’m so glad I ignored the butterflies in my tummy. It’s not often I can.

(With Ava’s Belle and Boo brooch, going to kindy).

I wanted to show you this photo, as soon as I saw it I thought of Ava’s beach photo..they just have the same look and you get to see how similar their features are. It’s such a treat to see glimpses of Ava in Ivy. I can’t imagine the hole being any bigger but without Ivy, it would certainly be blacker on more days.

Today Ivish turns two.

I love birthdays. I’m a very sentimental person so have always made a big deal out of them…Without wanting to sound too Hallmark, I just love the whole concept of people celebrating the day someone enters the World. It’s special.

With that said, since having children, I’ve thought it’s not really right that we mothers dont get a gift on each of our children’s birthdays. After all…on that very day… we were birthing them. Surely it’s us who deserve a marching band, standing ovations and a little something from Tiffany? (I think I feel a tradition coming on).

We will give Ivy her presents a little later today and I will no doubt post photos of her and the gifts and the cheezels but for now, I’m taking all the glory.

Happy Birthing Day to Me.

Manana, for those who don’t know, is Spanish for “tomorrow”. It’s a word often used in this household and for friends and family who know me well, this will come as no suprise. I am an expert at avoidance. I am a professional procrastinator. So with that confessed, here are a few more images I’ve proofed from Allies shoot the other week.
I know I should be doing other stuff.
Billstuff. Washingstuff. Packingstuff.
But this is more fun.

Ivish. Now, aint she sweet?

And while we’re sharing images of Gorgeous Girls With Attitude, here is Miss Indy – my beautiful niece who is frequently driven nutty by my boys.

He’s older.
He loves horror movies.
He tells me to get off the computer.
He puts “like” in front of every fourth word.
He trains in the gym with his Dad.
He gets Ivy dressed when I’m busy.
He told me I’m “lame”.
He’s got me totally wrapped around his finger.

How can my firstborn be more teen than toddler? Does this mean I’m a grownup? I’m still flinching from the “lame” accusation. Can I coin the term “Lummy” in lieu of Yummy Mummy? Is there a course for lame parents wanting to become all hip and acceptable.

Luca’s commissioned me to create art for his new bedroom wall.
I’m nervous about showing him later today. How funny.
I’m thinking really big for the storyboard?
Like. Poster size.

..that she wore for the first time today.

Believe it or not, Ivy has not been in our pool until this week. Before February Crayte was always busy taking Ava around the pool and Ivy didn’t know enough to pest to go in..After February, well..we just haven’t been swimming a great deal and seeing as we only have weeks left in this house, we decided it was time she should. So her with new (still too big) bikini and me with camera, we ventured down.

It seems such a simple thing, taking your child for a swim, but to us in our New Universe..it is so much more. It was so hard to see Ivy toddle down that path to the pool, to her Dad..into his arms. Splashing and playing and loving it – she would have no idea just how heavy our hearts felt or the enormity of the missing and the remembering and the wishing.

We never want Ivy to miss out, we want her to have the life she would have had with her sister but it’s such an enormous task..every single day… to just find moments of absolute joy and not think of what would have been.

She should be here.