A day.
A little earlier than expected.
And my heart skipped.
And I cried with surprise.
Which I truly could not believe.
And my heart sang.
And I cried with gratitude.
There was a day.
When you arrived so quietly.
You. Finally. It was you.
And my heart burst.
And I cried with happiness.
There was a day.
When I bought you a tutu.
Pink, and sparkly, of course.
And my heart danced alongside you.
And I cried with love.
There was a day.
Like any other day.
Except you left for Heaven.
And my heart broke.
And I cried. Endless tears.
There was a day.
It was yesterday.
Ivy said she wanted to ring you.
And my heart ached.
And Daddy cried.
There was a day
That should have been your birthday.
We’ll celebrate it anyway.
But our hearts mourn.
And tears, we still cry.
My darling Ava.
No matter how much I want to celebrate your birth on this day, it is so buried underneath the sorrow of what should have been.
You should be excited.
You should be here.
You should be five.
I can only imagine what you might have looked like now, what toys you would have
loved, what cake you would have wanted. Would your squeals sound older? Would your hair be longer? Would you have had a party?
I bought a pinata..a Dora one. And a tiara. And so many balloons. Be ready to catch them, won’t you?
Happy Birthday, my little Superprincess.
Iloveyousomuch.
Mumma. xx
132 shared sentiments
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I cry for your family often.
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Oh Sheye, my heart aches for you. I hope you can find a little bit of peace and something to smile about when your heart is breaking so.
Sending lots of love your way…
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Hugs Sheye. Thinking of you. And Ava.
xoxo, Rashmi
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Happy birthday sweetness. You will have to forgive us for all being so sad on your special day but it is just because we wish you were here so so much.
xxxxx
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My heart goes out to you today-across many, many, miles.
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My heart breaks for you and your family. Little Ava is in my thoughts often and reminds me to count my blessings. I now try to memorize every moment I spend with my children. I send you strength and a hug. Happy Birthday to your superprincess.
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Your words are beautiful.
I am so sorry you had to write them.
My tears, thoughts, and prayers go out to you…
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On this my husband’s birthday…I will light a candle on his cake just for Ava. Happy Birthday Miss Ava. Much love xx
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Sheye, I read your blog everyday. I just finished reading the book Comfort by Ann Hood and all I could think of as I read was you and Ava. Even though I don’t know you, I wish you all the strength and loving thoughts in the world today. I have a daughter of my own, and though I cannot begin to fathom how you feel, I hope mother to mother you will accept my condolences and wishes for peace today.
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Dear Sheye,
Thinking of you. Thinking of you all, longing for her. And of course, thinking of Ava too.
Happy Birthday Superprincess.
Much love,
Karen
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Happy 5th birthday Super Princess
I hope you caught the balloons your Mummy sent up for you ♥
Your mummy writes such beautiful words its hard to hold back the tears..
Sarah xx
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Sheye.
Oh, I’m crying.
What a beautiful post.Hugs and kisses is all I can send…
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Dear Sheye,
I have stumbled upon your blog by accident this week, and have been deeply affected and moved by the story of your little girl.I work in a school teaching Music. This is a song we are learning in Choir this term, and today when we rehearsed it, my thoughts were instantly with you, especially realising that it was Ava’s birthday today:
Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel)
Billy JoelGoodnight, my angel time to close your eyes
and save these questions for another day
I think I know what you’ve been asking me
I think you know what I’ve been trying to say
I promised I would never leave you,
and you should always know
Wherever you may go, no matter where you are,
I never will be far awayGoodnight my angel, now it’s time to sleep
and still so many things I want to say
Remember all the songs you sang for me
when we went sailing on an emerald bay
And like a boat out on the ocean
I’m rocking you to sleep
The water’s dark and deep inside this ancient heart
You’ll always be a part of meGoodnight my angel, now it’s time to dream
and dream how wonderful your life will be
Someday your child may cry, and if you sing this lullabye,
then in your heart there will always be a part of me.Someday we’ll all be gone but lullabies go on and on
They never die, that’s how you and I will be.Sheye, Blessings to you and your beautiful family. I am inspired by your courage and strength.
Megan xoxo
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Happy 5th Birthday Gorgeous girl!
You are never far from my thoughts little one.
Please send some beautiful rainbows & pink clouds for your family today :o)
Lotsa love to you all Sheye xx
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Happy 5th birthday Ava.
Wishing you strength through this time.
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Wishing you razor-free oxygen to breathe
My heart hurts because what I wish for you is not possible in this world. And what is possible in this world is not enough. I can only believe that there is more and that it will be worth the wait for you. That one day your energy and Ava’s energy will be joyfully reunited in some way that we cannot truly understand on the plane on which we exist right now. Sending you love on this day and every other
xxxxx
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Sheye, I am shedding tears for you today for everything you have lost.
Happy birthday Superprincess, look out for the presents from your Mummy. We will never forget you and all the special things about you.
xxxxxx
Kate -Tas
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Thinking of you and your family this day. Your story and your pictures have touched my heart.
~R~
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that was so beautiful, its got me in tears.
happy birthday ava,
love
Bee
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i cry happy tears today sheye. saddness for the unbeliveable and unfairness. but, yes happy too- because ava’s memory and her legacy can ONLY bring happiness and a smile to those who remember her. and love her. i don’t think anyone could look at her sweet innocent face and not swell up with love for such a child as ava. she will never be gone from our memories or hearts. please know my pink candle will be glowing strong today,and that you are being covered with prayer for strength. with MUCH love from the USA.
tara in maryland
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Sheye, my heart goes out to you on this day. We are thinking of you and your family and praying for you all.
Happy 5th birthday beauty full super princess.
Lots of love
Elise
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My heart aches for you today Sheye. Happy 5th Birthday to sweet sweet Ava.
Sending love and hugs to you all XXXX
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As I read your posts about Ava I feel sorrow at the loss you all endure but also light at the beautiful way you share the moments of your journey, both then & now. Thankyou Sheye you are truly an inspiration Nicxx
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Your blog is amazing and very inspirational. I come here often to follow your life and always leave a little better than before I came. The pictures of your children are like angels from Heaven. And your words are surely God inspired. I fought back the tears as I read your poem. Your strength surpasses all understanding. Much love to you and your family.
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My thoughts are with you and your family.
Happy Birthday Super Princess.
Love and big hugs,
Tania
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Love to you Sheye and your family,thinking of you today more then ever.
Happy 5th Birthday Princess Ava!!!
I hope you caught mummies balloons.
Love Dee xxxxx
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such a beautiful poem for a precious girl from an amazing mama … my thoughts are with you & your family on such a difficult day
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Your tears are shed around the world. Warm thoughts
Caro
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And my heart breaks.
Oh Sheye – I have said it before but I wish so much that I could take some of the pain for you.
Happy Birthday Superprincess.
xxoo
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Happy Birth Day you beauty full little princess.
It’s hard to believe that one little girl can touch so many hearts. May your gentle soul and tender heart live forever.Sheye – I hope you make it through the day with a few smiles. Hold your gorgeous family close and breath.
xxx
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Thinking of you and your family today Sheye.
Happy Birthday Super Princess xxx
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My thoughts, my tears, my love for you and yours today.
Pink Sparklies for you today Ava. Happy Birthday.
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Happy Birthday to your Superprincess!
My heart is aching for you today!
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Tears and hugs.
Love,
Jane
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Happy birthday sweet Ava!!
Sheye my heart aches for you, very Beauty Full words! All my love to you & your family, keeping you all in my thoughts & prayers!
love,
Tanya xoxoxo
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I am usually so positive, but today I can’t help it, I am sad. I SO loved “5″ with my daughters, it’s so NOT FAIR that you aren’t getting to see the beautiful Ava as she would be at 5. Then I smile as we all know what she would have been like so it’s like she is here with us.
Love and hugs to you and your family Sheye xxx
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Beautiful Beautiful! You are simply talented with everything you do. Happy Birthday beautiful Ava, have fun catching the balloons :)
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My heart aches so much for you today.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family!I’m sure she’ll love the balloons!
Happy Birthday SuperPrincess Ava.
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Happy birthday to your sweet angel! My heart aches for you. I always tear up when I visit your blog, yet I keep coming back.
Thinking of your family often.
Katie
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Happy Birthday Beautiful Ava.
Savor those hugs and kisses from Ivy, Mason, Luca, and Crayton. They will lift you up.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Happy Birthday Beautiful Ava.
Savor those hugs and kisses from Ivy, Mason, Luca, and Crayton. They will lift you up.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Happy 5th Birthday Princess Ava.
Sheye thinking of you and your family today and always..
Love
Claire
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My heart is with you all… your sorrow I can only begin to understand. Please know you are in my prayers. Always.
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oh Sheye ~ I am so very very sorry. Your post had brought tears to my eyes today ~ I wish you could feel how tight we are hugging you right now. Happy Birthday to your superprincess – who is surely watching you from above –
xoxo ~ Darcie
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SHeye…my heart is beating a few extra beats for you and for Ava. Only a mother can know the incredible love for a daughter, but only you know the grief and pain. You are so gracious to share the load on friends who want to carry all of it for you. I feel like I know Ava because of your weekly gifts in sharing, and somehow in the words and pictures you share, she has never really left. You are lovely. My prayers are with you!
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your words are a beautiful tribute to your superprincess.
happy birthday angel.
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Happy birthday, beautiful angel-girl.
Hugs to you Sheye…
Linda
Norway
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Shedding some tears after reading your post. Hugs & prayers, Rosie
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And if I listen to the sound of white, sometimes I hear your smile and breathe your light.
(Missy Higgins – The Sound of White)As I read through all of these posts many emotions bubble up inside me. One thing that stands true is that your baby girl was so loved and she has touched so many, in ways we will never know, never feel and never see. I believe there are Ava fairy sprinkles across the world, catch them and hold them.
Keren
xxx
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I love seeing in frames, I love the beauty in the ordinary, I love my camera, I love that when I see images I hear too. I love the latelight, I love finding moments I didn’t imagine and I love creating moments I did. I love learning more every day, I love sharing what I’ve come to know, and I love making pictures pretty.
I’m so glad you stopped by. xx
Happy Birthday Superprincess!! Your words touched the depths of my heart Sheye… and as it did my heart broke once more for your loss. Thinking of you and praying for you…