Learning to Swim While Drowning {Back to Basics}
It is with a heavy heart that I share my thoughts today.
Lindy Chamberlain said, regarding life after the loss of her daughter “It is like learning to swim while drowning”. In recent weeks, for many reasons, I have found myself so depleted of emotional energy, I’m not sure I even remember what it is to swim letalone learning it again. I am okay..I’m just tired.
With that said, I realise I need to get back to basics – to have the fundamentals in place before I can start to restore again. For the past eight months, I have put so much energy into preserving the memory of Ava – not just here, but in lots of different ways – wanting to share her wonder and beauty and most difficult of all, trying to find mere words to describe the agony of life after losing her.. It is what I have needed to do and has given me so much more than I ever could have expected.
Through blogging here, I have met the most beautiful people and developed amazing friendships. I am beyond grateful for the support I have received and the opportunity to share random moments of such a personal journey but now I need to take some time to gather my precious family together in preparation for our big move to Brisbane. To take a little break. This too feels right.
To every person who has taken the time to read my posts, who have honoured Ava in their own way, who have planted her Gardenias, who have hung her photo, who have bought her prints, who will order her book, who hug their children more, who see pink and think of Ava..to every single person who has extended such incredible love to me and my family..with all of my heart, I thank you.
And to my darling Ava. For being Amazing. Enchanting. Beauty Full. For letting me share your light. Thankyou.
43 shared sentiments
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Dear Sheye,
You need to do what is best for YOU and your family always. The rest is secondary.
I wish for you all the strength and love to get you through to a point where you find enjoying life easier again (with Ava beside you).
Much Love
Kym
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I think this is a good idea. I wish you the best of luck. I just found your blog a few weeks ago, but it truly did inspire me to appreciate my little one even more every day. Bless you.
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we should be thanking you..for letting us peek in on your beautiful family.
Your truly an inspiration to us all!
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Thank you Sheye, for having the courage to be so honest. The real, brutal, gnawing loss of your beautiful girl has seen you bravely stumble into the darkness, and you have come back with your words to share, often with people you have never even met. I think in that dark place there is a soft light that surrounds you while you walk, and that is Ava’s love. The love you shared, you and Ava, is not something to touch, but something to feel and breath
and cherish. That light is for no-one else. It is only for Ava’s mum.We think of you everyday.
Love from
Anna and Grace x
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I, too, am grateful to have had the chance to learn and grow from your experience. My prayer for you is that you find exactly what you are longing for…not just a wish but a sure knowledge that families are FOREVER and you can be with your Super Princess in the eternities. I know this is TRUE! Best wishes to you and your beautiful family as you continue on.
God bless,
Lynette
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Thank you Sheye for sharing your gorgeous daughter with all of us. The impact Ava left on me would be forever. Thank you so very much.
I wish you all the best with your move. Love to you and your beautiful family.
xoxoxoxox,
Fari
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Sheye,
You will always be in my thoughts.
Avas memory could not be any more alive.Her beauty and her spirit is forever etched in my mind and Im sure that of so so many others
Wishing you and your family all the best with the move
Honestly Sheye ..the thanks is all to you for the wonderful gift of Ava
Love Kaz
xoxox
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We will miss you and your powerful word pictures Sheye – but every single person you have touched through this Blog can only wish the very best for you.
Take whatever time, space, energy you need to replenish and readjust – know that we all are behind you with our prayers, wishes, tears and smiles. Even though most of us have never met – please feel our collective positive energy for all the Rosemeyer family.
Through you, Ava’s spirit has achieved a ripple effect of love, gratitude and grace. What a pair of remarkable girls you are.
Kate F
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Best wishes to all of you in whatever way you need strength, rest and renewal. Change is often one of the hardest aspects of grief, yet I know you will find ways to embrace it and to preserve Ava’s memories. I understand the agony and the depth and breadth of the pain caused by death. But you know I have learned to see beauty and to choose my path in life. You are doing the same…and sharing it with others. It is amazing as much as it is bittersweet. Ava will follow you wherever you go. And the color pink will never fade. =)Grace to you and your family on your journey.
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Sheye,
I certainly hope you are feeling the love ;-)
I am going to miss your posts and your photography and I am feeling a certain sence of loss right now, but of course I get this is not about me!
Gather up the family and prepare for your move. It is hard work.
Hey, my invitation still stands.
Love to you, Crayton, Luca, Mason and Ivy. Most of all thank you for sharing Ava with us, I am forever thankful.
Shayne
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You amaze me…. just by putting one foot in front of the other and having the courage to share…. even in the midst of the worst pain imaginable. Thoughts and prayers for you as you make this transition. I know your mother will be so thrilled to have you closer to her.
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All the best to you and yours, Sheye. It has been an honor to read about your family. Thank you for sharing so openly with us and giving us all a chance to know that beauty full Super Princess.
Good luck with the moving. We will miss you here, but the prayers for you and your family will not cease.
With Love, Jenna (GA, USA)
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I’ve thought so often of something you once said on your blog, about “whole families” and people taking them for granted. In my own struggles this summer, those words have come to mind so often and it’s helped so much to keep things in perspective. I just adore your blog ever so much and my heart hurts for your loss. I’m so sorry.
Take a break, take all the time you need. Best of luck with your move.
xoxo
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I love you darling.
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Good luck with the move Sheye.. I cannot fathom how difficult it will be for you, Crayton and the boys.
Leilani Kaiesha and I are moving for the 2nd time since Ava left us. We brought her gardenia from the old house to this one, and it is moving with us on Wednesday to the new. Ava is always in our hearts. She reminds me daily to appreciate and love my daughters for who and what they are. Bless you, Mandy xxx
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Sheye
You, Ava and your family have touched so many people in so many ways. The way you have written just giving your all has I am sure helped many people even dealing with their own grief. I suppose just knowing they aren’t walking the road alone.
I so know where you are coming from with having to regroup. I do it often just go back to the beginning and start again!
Big hugs and I’ll see you in Brisbane!
Sue xx
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Sheye it is YOU who WE need to thank… your willingness to share so much of your beautiful Ava & you, has touched so many around the world and no doubt changed many lives… I wish you, Crayton, Luca, Mason & sweet little Ivy all the very best with your big move to Brisbane, I hope you find happiness in life again, Ava will always be with you no matter where you go… I will miss you my sweet friend, if you find yourself down this way you know where to find me… Thank you Sheye for all that you have done for me, I will be forever grateful :) xxxx
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I am a changed woman just because I have gotten to know you and your families story. Please, let us know how things work out for you and your family with the big move. You are in our thoughts and prayers. May you hold tight to that which will make you truly happy.
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I wish you and your family the best and i hope that your move to Brisbane goes smoothly.
You are such a wonderful brave person, and i hope that once you have had your space and taken the time that you need you will come back and share some more wonderful stories about your Ava, because i adore reading about her. You bring her back to life with all your beautiful photos and entries.
Best of luck xx
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Sheye,
Thank you for sharing so much of your heart here. I know there is so much more, but I feel honored that you have been brave to let us in. You have truly given me a gift, as others have said.
I think of you and Ava often as you have quietly eased your way into my heart. My children have benefited as well as I. However, I know that this gift came at a price. You have paid an unimaginable price and my heart aches for you. I promise to pray for you and your family when you come to mind, for peace and comfort in the moments you most need it.
Blessings to you,
Sheri
sheria@new.rr.com
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Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful family and your beautiful Ava with us. I pray that your journey to a new place will bring you much happiness. Just know that you, Crayton, Luca, Mason, Ava and Ivy will be thought of will love…. so very often. God Bless You All!
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I will miss your words, your spirit, your insigth and your pictures terribly, Sheye, but am so lucky to have found you on Grow and through your blog. So many others on here have said it better than I ever could, but you have changed my life and that of so many. I will carry Ava in my heart until my forever is up. She will never be far from my thoughts, nor will you.
All my love,
Sara Moon
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Thanks, Sheye.
I’m a silent reader of your blog, and I have always found it absolutely inspiring. Not just your amazing photos, but your beautiful spirit that comes through in your pictures and words. I can only imagine the pain you must feel after losing your beautiful Ava, but my heart and my prayers go out to you and your family.
I can sense your strength, and I believe that will see you through this difficult time. Just a wonderful piece of advice someone once gave me, instead of asking “why me,” ask yourself “what now.” What can you do to live each day to the fullest and grow from this experience?
You’re strong. And you know what’s important. How inspiring. :)
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Sheye, I know this is going to be such a tough time for you but I am certain it will be worth it. You know you can come and see any of us any time you like, for a cupcake :) or a backyard bbq with a game of footy for the boys. It will be really nice to see you all and get to know your boys & Ivy better xx
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I have been going through Sheye withdrawals as you took a couple weeks off there. Thank you for so beautifully describing the feelings of my heart. God has given you so many gifts of expression and you truly bless other with those gifts. Thank you for your encouragement and example of strength. Good luck with the move. It is not an easy adjustment, as we just did it 7 months ago-but it is very helpful in grieving. It wasn’t easy to move, but then again, it wasn’t easy to stay put right where the accident occured. So there are pluses and minuses of both. I pray you continue to get the support you have in the past. Much love
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Sheye,
Though we are mere strangers living thousands of miles apart, both you and Ava have touched my heart and life tremendously in so many different ways…thank you :]
I wish you and your family all the best with your move xxxxxx
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Sheye,
I hope that you know how much your beautiful words, your amazing photos and your courageous spirit have warmed the hearts of so many people, all the world over. I hope that you feel that warmth reflected now…that you feel the love you have sent out into the world wrapping its arms gently around you, as you make this very difficult transition.
Thank you, for sharing so much of yourself here with us.
Love to you and yours,
Kirsten
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thank YOU sheye, for sharing a bit of your life with us.
for teaching us to love more…
to appreciate more…
to touch more…you will be missed.
love and strength to you and yours.
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Sheye, I came across your blog by chance tonight – i was searching photography sights, and i just had to comment.
Your family, and words have touched me in a way i cannot describe.
Your photos are breathtaking – they tell a story.
Ava is and always will be such a beautiful, gorgeous little angel. I cant even begin to imagine how hard everything is atm. Thankyou for sharing your beautiful images and honest memores with us.
I will never forget little Ava – and will remember her every time i look at her beautiful canvas. I hugged my child so much longer tonight, thankyou and take care of yourself and your beautiful family.
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A friend of mine told me to look at your blog…and I have been so touched by it. I, too, always wanted a little daughter….and I love how you’ve openly shared your love for Ava and her life with everyone. I am truly amazed at what a wonderful mother you are. I want you to know that I sat down with my little ones this morning, after reading your blog and Ava’s Tribute last night…and explained to them about Ava’s Warning. What a special little angel….still touching everyone’s lives. I also ordered some prints for my daughter’s room. I don’t think I will ever forget your daughter, even though I never knew her… The way you’ve written about her, and your AMAZING photographs…have made me feel like I did know her. My heart goes out to you, and my prayers are with you….Mother to Mother. Thank you for making me want to be a better Mom…and for helping me to realize how lucky I am to be a Mother.
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Sheye,
I can’t possibly ever know what kind of a journey this has been for you and for your family. As I have said before, I wish that we could all take a piece of your pain away until it was no more. That beautiful little Ava of yours has crept into my heart and found a place to stay. I can never forget the Rosemeyer famliy. Thank you for being such an inspiration of bravery…of talent…of a wonderful mother…of a beautiful person who has shared a piece of her heart and soul with those of us around the world. I believe with all of my heart that Ava is orchestrating this move as she knows it is the best thing for you and your family. Always and forever in my prayers. Thank you for sharing Sheye and thank you little Ava for making this world a better place. Many wishes and love, Krysta
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Sheye and family: Wow. I’ll never be able to complain about my three girls without thinking about your recent loss. I started reading your blog today and shared your story already with my family and friends. I’ve kissed and hugged all three of my girls today a little bit harder and a little bit extra for your little Ava. Your strength to carry on is truly amazing.
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I am 18 and have been following your blog for some months now. I can tell you that i have shared with you in tears and laughs and will always remember Ava and your beautiful family.
May i share a favorite? :) When Crayton says Missy Ava comin up the drive… you know the rest. I still read this and laugh. She was beautiful, IS beautiful, and will truly never be forgotten.
My best of luck to you, i will very much miss your genuine thoughts and wonderful photography.
much love,
Lauren- in South Carolina
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Thank YOU Sheye.
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thank you. for all of the time and effort and beauty you have put into preserving her memory. it has caused many tears and many more hugs within our house.
i think of your family often and wish you daily happiness and rejuvination. i hope to hear and see your amazing photography here again. but take all the time that you need.
and that song… that song makes me cry. huge tears.
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I am so very sorry Sheye. I am feeling your pain as I read this. I think about your family all the time. You are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. Big hugs to all of you!
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YOu will always be in my thoughts and prayers. Your willing to share the entire time I have read your blog is amazing to me- a true tribute to who you are!
I wish you the best and safest journey as you pick your family up and move forward.
If you ever need a lifeline.. for when you feel at the deepest point in the pool you know we are here.. thinking of you…
Much love!
AnneMarieZ
Texas
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I came upon your work through a photographer in Idaho……that was almost a year ago. I always check out your site to see whats new and get INSPIRED by your amazing work.
Your family is beautiful…..your Ava is beautiful. As others have said, you are strong and make us all realize not to take things for granted. Thank you from the bottom of my heart~Lacey
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I admire you!
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Hi Sheye,
I came across your blog last night and I wasn’t paying much attention to the words, but I was captivated by your gorgeous photographs of your little girl, as I have one the same age.
Then I read the words…I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl. I can’t imagine how you feel, but I admire your honesty and how you have preserved her memory, she was a credit to you Funny, kind and brave.
Love to you and your family
xxxxx
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Sometimes there are just no words…Hugs and love to you and your family!!
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Dear Sheye
You tell us about a mothers nightmare. My heart is crying.
Let the candle glow for your family.
Norway
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I love seeing in frames, I love the beauty in the ordinary, I love my camera, I love that when I see images I hear too. I love the latelight, I love finding moments I didn’t imagine and I love creating moments I did. I love learning more every day, I love sharing what I’ve come to know, and I love making pictures pretty.
I’m so glad you stopped by. xx
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Ava is just so easy to honour Sheye and the way you have made her memory come so alive is just truly amazing.
Thank YOU for being so open. Thank YOU for sharing your Princess. Thank YOU for giving me 2 days of memories with your daughter that I will always hold so very close to my heart.
Love to you, Crayton, Luca, Mason and Ivy today and always and good luck for the big move.
xxxx